So my life is feeling a bit more honest than usual lately so I thought I'd share a few confessions. Here's a sneak peek into my world. Maybe just maybe, stranger-friend, you'll stick around.
Confession: Sometimes I struggle with feeling like I have strong community even though I don't struggle with making friends.
I've been thinking about community more lately. As followers of Christ, this is important anyway, but it's something that I value a ton, so it comes up a lot for me. I'm built extremely relationally so lots of my stories relate to community in some form. But I've noticed that when community seems 'off' in some way in my life, instead of showing up, I want to back away.
Sometimes you have to do the opposite of what you want to do.
Tonight. Was the night I attended a new gathering at my church that I wasn't super thrilled about, even during part of the time I was there. Everything sounded oversimplified and I thought I'd just listen.
Listening is good. And needed. But people also need our words, our voices matter, and at times it takes more courage to speak when you'd rather be silent than to be silent when you want to speak.
Confession: When I meet people, I can get a little excited and forget that we are still basically strangers.
Like tonight. Found out some new (now) friends just came from living in the Congo. They don't know a lot of people here yet. They were surprised to know I knew so much about those countries until I told them I once went out with someone from the Congo. Of course.
I am pretty sure I told a couple stories at the table and there were a few blank stares. I need to remember if I don't know you, you are a stranger. You might not get my stories. Repeat.
Confession: After this happened and I told some random stories to strangers, I called a friend I've known for no more than two weeks and met the exact same way to tell her what happened. Her voicemail came on. I left a message.
I didn't describe in detail what happened. But we became friends after we had an unusual meeting. So I'm hopeful about these new friends. Sometimes you just need to shake it up a little.
Confession: I miss my faraway friends, I just do.
I'm so thankful for my friends here, my close friends who I have in my everyday life now. They have been a blessing and God's gift. But I also realize that friendships make up a great deal of my community, and it's hard when people move away, even if normal. I know that the people I'm closest to have represented God to me and walked with me. Been a friend at all times.
Because the Cayman Islands are too far I'm starting a save the fish fundraiser.
I must admit it's just a cover for me to get over there to visit my friend, but I will do my best to help the fish if you help me, or at least to conserve them.
Confession: Sometimes blogging feels like talking to strangers at a round table who are starring at me blankly. Only I can't see your faces. I'm not sure if that's better or worse.
Technically, I can see your faces, when you comment. I'm getting better at creating real community in blog world and I get excited every time I make a connection that becomes real and you know me and I know you, and I like to suppose the faces cease from their blankness, a little bit at least.
What is the hardest thing for you about community, about friendships, about online world?
linking with Lisa-Jo for five minute friday and emily for imperfect prose