Monday, June 17, 2013

When You Have Nothing To Say (And It Shocks People)

It seems like over the course of lately, I've wanted to hush things a little.

*It may even be time for a little bloggy break. Just a small one.

I may pop in here and there, but it's summer and vitamin d and going to see my family and it looks like it might be good to work on a couple other writing projects and then check back in with y'all soon.

:::I need space in my days and weeks and months to think and mull and ponder. Even as I have cut back on appointments and outings and commitments, I still find myself awake past my bedtime to simply soak in the quiet. My soul needs space. And it doesn’t come easy. It doesn’t come without a price and it doesn’t come on its own.
I have to make it come. Because life is messy and fluid and maddeningly unpredictable.:::
-Emily Freeman

This sounds so simple. It's not, but I get it. I get the simply soaking part. I get the staying up too late and just needing quiet.

I get that life is 'maddeningly unpredictable' and if we just say that out loud, it might help us see that it is not up to us in the end. It is not up to me. Even when I want it to be, even when I think I can hold things together nicely somehow, thank you very much.

God is the one fighting for us. Oh, this is beautiful and I am so thankful for this truth. He fights for us --for me, too -- when I have difficulty being still, when life is in transition, when not-where-we-want-to-be is the space we get to be in and we think we know better what we need. And, when things are good and sweet and there's pie every day.

Slowly, in all this, trust falls off our own shoulders and things start to get quieter.

When one is dried out and needs a break, it is good to admit when you'd rather listen than talk. Rather hear what God has to say than the words you have to say...

So I am deciding to give myself space and say less.

My dad might appreciate this. Or fall over in his chair. He is forever listening to me. Thank you, Dad, for being you. I love you. Thank you for genuinely caring for and loving people for who they are.

A belated link up for five minute Friday : Listen

*I love you guys. I'll be back soon!